The tension is thick in this chapter….Get ready for a roller coaster of emotions (Coming mainly from Ye Lin once again…haha) And many more new names to remember!
The Wind Blows Away Not Only The Memories
In the afternoon, Mo Jia Zhen, an old classmate, called. She is a rare friend that I’m still in contact with, even after all these years. She apologized saying, “I struggled for a long time, but I still decided to come plead for my guilt. I really, desperately, tried to resist. I originally didn’t want to give your phone number to him. But you know Ye Lin, he has always been insidiously vicious. He actually smiled ‘sweetly’ while telling me, if I don’t give your number to him, in the future when I have my wedding, he’ll be sure to come crash it…. The point is, An Jie, I’m really sorry.”
“It’s okay. Besides, once I return to France, this number will be of no use.”
“I just knew you would be the most understanding! Also, you checked the text I sent you earlier right? Tonight at seven, let’s have a meal together. Lin Xiao Di’s treat.”
Lin Xiao Di was my high school desk mate. Later, she married a Taiwanese man. I couldn’t attend her wedding because I was abroad at the time. In regards to this, I’ve always felt somewhat guilty. After all, Lin Xiao Di had always sincerely treated me as her good friend. And in my life, these type of people are so very few.
The last time I met Lin Xiao Di was two years ago. Lin Xiao Di and Mo Jia Zhen travelled to Europe for vacation. I acted as their tour guide for several days.
“When did she come over?”
“Today. As soon as I mentioned to Xiao Di that you’d returned, she immediately bought a ticket and flew over. She’ll probably arrive around five in the afternoon.” Jia Zhen laughed, “If I didn’t know that woman was already married, I would totally think she’s madly in love with you.”
“What nonsense are your sprouting.” I thought for a bit and ended up saying, “Tonight, I’ll attend with Pu Zheng. I think I’ve come down with a cold, I’ll let him accompany me over.”
“Pu Zheng? I know him, senior Pu. Didn’t he used to occasionally come find you to speak with you? Don’t tell me, you two are now…….”
I helplessly tell her, “He is my aunt’s second husband’s son. Although there’s no blood relation, he’s still my respected older brother. Stop having such crazy thoughts in the future.
“Aunt? The one who hosted us when we went to Finland?”
“Yes.” When Pu Zheng’s father passed away, my aunt was heart broken and went abroad. One year later, I arrived in France. Luckily, during that period of time, if necessary, I could still visit her frequently. Otherwise, those days of helpless isolation really would’ve been unbearable.
That night when I arrived with Pu Zheng to a certain restaurant’s VIP room, Mo Jia Zhen and Lin Xiao Di had both arrived already. Jia Zhen was just about to call the waiter to pour the water. When Lin Xiao Di saw me, she excitedly ran over to hug me. She aggressively expressed some of her longings and resentments she had bottled up for a long time. The so call resentment was towards why l had told Jia Zhen that I’d returned, but didn’t not her.
I told her that since she was in Taiwan, even if I told her, there wouldn’t be a point.
“Why no use?” Lin Xiao Di pointed to herself. After completing the motion, she started to laugh first. “Okay, okay, I’ll stop fooling around. An Jie, let me introduce you to my husband.” She turned around to introduce the man sitting on the sofa. “This is Qu Wei, my husband. This is Jian An Jie, my best friend.”
I also introduced Pu Zheng to the couple, “My brother, Pu Zheng.”
Lin Xiao Di smiled, “I already heard from Jia Zhen. Hello senior Pu. You guys talk, I’m going to go help Mo Jia Zhen order the dishes. That lady will definitely only order a whole bunch of seafood again. I hate seafood!” Finished talking, she quickly went in Mo Jia Zhen’s direction.
Qu Wei resignedly shook his head.
“Xiao Di will forever be so full of energy.” I say sincerely.
“Indeed.” Qu Wei laughed. “I’ve long heard of you, Miss Jian. Xiao Di often mentioned you. I heard you were studying in France?”
I smiled and nodded.
“It must’ve been hard studying abroad alone?”
“It was okay.” Actually, I didn’t care too much about the studying. If I’m being honest, I just wanted to survive.
Right then, someone opened the door. It was Ye Lin. Behind him was Ya Li.
The man was handsome and candid. The woman was beautiful and poised.
Ye Lin looked towards us with a surprised expression. “Sorry. Entered the wrong room. However, what coincidence —— Lin Xiao Di, long time no see.”
“Ye Lin.” Xiao Di’s surprise was real.
Ye Lin raised his eyebrows, and looked at the circle of people inside the room. “Is this a reunion between the old classmates? Why wasn’t Ya Li and I included?”
Xiao Di stated bluntly, “You two are such prominent figures. My humble tables and bowls wouldn’t have been adequate for the situation. If I had invited you two, it would’ve lowered your statuses.”
Ye Lin said with a hint of smile: “I don’t mind lowering my status occasionally.”
“You!” Xiao Di was angry.
Ye Lin wanted to continue, but Yang Ya Li pulled him from behind. “Okay, okay, stop bickering with Xiao Di.” She turned around to speak with Xiao Di, “You should also stop mocking us. Everyone hasn’t seen each other for many years. Since we’ve bumped into each other, let’s just have a meal. My treat.”
Xiao Di pondered for a moment. She eventually relented: “Okay. Waiter. Add more dishes. Bring the most expensive dishes available in your restaurant over.” And then, she turned in Yang Ya Li’s direction, “Miss Yang, you’re rich, I hope you don’t mind I added a few expensive dishes?”
Yang Ya Li generously said: “Do as you wish.” Once she finished talking, her eyes somewhat intentionally glanced in my direction.
Honestly, she really didn’t have to be so conscious of me. After all, the person she’s actually concerned about is firmly standing next to her only.
I pretended nothing was going on and nodded my head in Yang Ya Li’s direction. As I was about to turn, I caught a glimpse of her cold and flirtatious eyes that were full of ridicule.
I admit, due to her expression, I felt a moment of slight heartache. I walked up to the table and sat down. While I admitted it, nonetheless, I would not permit myself to experience it next time.
When I sat down, my phone vibrated. It was a text. “You don’t want to see me, and yet, you have seen me.”
I looked up in Ye Lin direction. He had his head lowered, playing with his cellphone.
I typed the words: “You stalked me? And then called your girlfriend over? Ye Lin, you’re really nonsensical.” Once the text was sent, I put the cellphone in my coat pocket and refrained from looking at it further.
“Hey!” Qu Wei walked over and gave me a glass of warm water. “Earlier when I heard you speak, your voice sounded hoarse. Are you sick? Drink some water.”
“Thank you.” I accepted the water. This man is very considerate. Although Xiao Di had to uproot and move when she married him, she is likely living pretty well.
“If it’s serious, you should go have it checked out by the doctor and get some medicine. It’ll help you recover faster.”
“Okay, thank you.” I’m still not used to others being concerned with me.
“Although it’s our first meeting, since we’re all friends, you don’t need to be so polite with me.” He said with a smile.
I helplessly sighed, and thought: I’m not trying to be polite, but rather, you’re sitting too close. Making me feel so unnatural. But, what I can’t deny is that at this moment, what’s making me feel the most uncomfortable is that line of sight that never left.
When everyone was seated, Jia Zhen and Pu Zheng was on my left and right. Next to Jia Zhen was Xiao Di and Qu Wei. Next to Pu Zheng was Yang Ya Li and Ye Lin. With this kind of unintentional seating arrangement, I just so happen to be facing Ye Lin directly. So, I tried my best to eat while keeping my head low.
I’m not scared, nor do I want to escape. I just didn’t want to cause trouble. Also, probably due to my cold, I felt drowsy and lacked energy.
Jia Zhen and Lin Xiao Di were encouraging people from across the table to compete with each other through wine and criticizing each other’s poor choice in selecting the dishes.
“Okay, let’s not talk about the dishes.” Jia Zhen picked up her chop sticks and pointed at Xiao Di. “Lin Xiao Di, if we say you look ugly, we might be going overboard. But, you definitely don’t qualify as pretty either. So, how did you manage to find such a good husband? Come on, please teach me.”
“I chased with my feet” Xiao Di said in all seriousness and laughed. “Actually, if you want to learn how to chase after guys, you should learn from Yang Ya Li. She’s more of a expert than me. Back when Ya Li was chasing after Ye Lin, it roused the attention of the entire school.” Xiao Di said all of that without a hint of humor. It was 100 percent serious.
Jia Zhen nodded her head, “That’s true, I really should learn from Miss Yang.”
These two acted in perfect harmony to show their support for me. To have friends who were so protective of me, I was very touched. But I didn’t really want to mention the past.
Yang Ya Li’s expression was somewhat ugly, “There really isn’t much to talk about. There was mutual feelings, so we got together.”
“Mutual feelings? Heh, this is interesting. I remember back when you used to hang around Ye Lin, he still belonged exclusively to An Jie. So tell me, which part of this demonstrated that there was mutual feelings? Don’t tell me long ago, you were already plotting something.”
Jia Zhen’s words completely silenced the entire room.
I looked at the figure in front of my eyes and felt even more tire.
“Actually.” Surprisingly, the first person to break the silence was Yang Ya Li. Her tone was profound. “Although Ye Lin did have a girlfriend at the time, other people still have the right to pursue, no?”
“Ya Li.” Ye Lin cried out.
“Also, at the time…..”
“Enough! Ya Li.”
My heart skipped a beat. I looked at the person ahead, it’s obvious he’s become angry.
Yang Ya Li’s face already turned white. She looked at Ye Lin. After a long while, she muttered a sentence, “Don’t be angry. I won’t continue talking, isn’t that okay?”
This kind of scenario. Not making any complaints, or leaving after slamming the door. Only a soft, almost courteous, sincere apology. I think Ya Li must really love Ye Lin, to be so overly cautious and careful with him.
And today, I felt even more like an outsider.
“Isn’t the purpose of today to welcome An Jie? How come the main lead is not talking?”
I was momentarily surprised, and looked at the person who had just spoken. Ye Lin lazily leaned back on his chair, eyes half squinting, with one arm resting on the back of his chair. His whole demeanor was laid back. The arrogance from before was gone, what’s left is his usual loose and carefree character.
“There’s nothing to say.” I quietly said.
“How can that be?” Ye Lin pretended to sound surprise. “Being abroad for so many years, returning for the first time, how can you not have anything to say……to your old friends?” His voice was overly gentle, and faintly taunting. But, in here, probably only I can hear it.
Sensing that I’m being put on the spot, Qu Wei tried to help me out: “Miss Jian, why don’t you talk about some of the fun things you did while in France?”
I thought about it for a bit and decided to speak the truth. “There really wasn’t anything fun.” There were a lot of not so fun things, but it’s probably best not to mention them.
At this point, Xiao Di laughed: “How can that be? There are so many hot men in France. Our An Jie is so beautiful, there must be a lot of admirers?”
I smiled, “Indeed, there are a lot of guys who look handsome in France.”
“Then, you must’ve had several relationships while you were there?” The one who asked the question was Yang Ya Li. She was natural and graceful.
Instead of replying, I grabbed the cup in front of me and turned it around in my hands.
“Don’t drink if you’re sick.” It was Pu Zheng’s voice, it sounded really majestic.
Because I wasn’t really concentrating earlier, I didn’t notice what Xiao Di had poured into my cup. I was thirsty, so grabbed the cup to drink. Only now did I notice that it was red wine.
I smiled and put down the cup. I am actually someone that really can’t drink wine. Due to my allergic reaction to alcohol, if I accidentally consumed any, my entire body would start itching, and my throat would hurt. If it’s really serious, I would even have difficulty breathing. Not too many people know of my condition. Amongst the people here, probably only two people are aware of it.
“Jian An Jie, when did you become so obedient? Said Ye Lin, with a faint smile while looking at me.
I sighed. “Six years’ time, everything can change.”
His eyes suddenly turned cold for a sec, but in the next second, it returned to normal. “Yes. Six years, 2190 days, 52560 hours, 3153600 minutes. Indeed, anything can change within that period of time.”
My hands became stiff for a second and I stopped talking. After all, this type of topic, even if we continued, it would be pointless.
Who would’ve thought that Ye Lin actually wanted to continue. He raised from his seat and walked towards me. “Since today we are welcoming Jian An Jie, we should all make a toast to her. Wishing her a “glorious return,” first time being back in six years.” Once he finished talking, he drained his cup.
His tall stature oppressed all of my sensory nerves when he’s in such close proximity.
“You’re not going to do me the honor?”
I took a deep breath. It felt like there was something stuck in my chest, making me feel very uncomfortable.
“Ye Lin!” Pu Zheng got up to stand in front of me. His tone was visibly marked with anger.
Everyone seemed to be slightly confused. Jia Zhen and Xiao Di teamed up to deal with the situation. Yang Ya Li also got up. She walked towards Ye Lin and pulled his hands. “What’s wrong? Why are you like this today? Okay, okay, let’s stop being so childish.”
She said Ye Lin is like a child? The sharpest person I know is actually being described by someone as being childish.
I took hold of my cup. As the red wine slid down my throat slowly, I desperately tried to swallow, but, the last sip nonetheless still caused me to choke out the content. I painfully covered my mouth while coughing repeatedly. The burning sensation from my stomach spread to the rest of my body, making me feel like my entire body was in pain.
“Jian An Jie, looks like in the future I will have to keep a close eye on you. To actually be allergic to alcohol…… Do you feel really touched? I, Ye Lin, have never treated anybody this good before.” The wind blew away not only the memories from the past.
When I woke up, it was already late at night. The air was filled with the unpleasant scent of alcohol and the surrounding area was very quiet.
Under the dark light, Pu Zheng was sitting in a chair with a very serious expression.
I reluctantly moved the corner of my mouth. “This is the best sleep I’ve had since I arrived back.”
After a long silence, he helplessly sighed. “Really don’t know what to say about you.”
To be honest, even I’m not so sure myself. I originally thought that the red wine at most would cause me to have erythema. Unexceptionally, I fainted and had to be sent to the hospital. It really was overboard.
“Sorry. To have caused you to worry.” I apologized.
“You definitely needed to apologize.” Said Pu Zheng.
After saying this, his whole demeanor wasn’t so serious anymore.
Suddenly he remembered something and started laughing. “That Xiao Di. Heh. You scared her to the point that she started crying.
“Ya, Xiao Di is emotional.”
“Yes, way too emotional. I had to persuade her for a long time before she finally left.” Pu Zheng paused for a sec and then continued, “I know you’re tired, so I let them go back first.”
“Okay, thanks.” My sleep quality is generally bad, and if there’s noise by my side, I definitely wouldn’t have been able to sleep.
Truthfully, I can’t really accept sleeping in the hospital either.
I looked at the IV tube and then directed one of my best smile at Pu Zheng. “Let’s go back? I don’t really want to stay at the hospital.”
“Let’s wait a bit longer. At least until you finished the IV drip. You also have a slight fever.” His voice wasn’t hard, but the tone was persistent.
I raised my hand to look at my watch, it’s 1:15 in the morning. I tried to compromise: “It’s already so late, you should go back and rest.”
“I don’t feel at ease with you being here alone.”
“What’s there to worry about. Rather, with someone here, I can’t sleep very well.”
Pu Zheng thought for a bit and in the end nodded his head. “Alright, I’ll return tomorrow morning. While I’m back, I’ll also make something for you to eat. You definitely wouldn’t be used to the food here.”
“I want to have green bean honey porridge.”
“Noted.” Pu Zheng grabbed his suite jacket from the bottom of the bed and left. When he got to the door, he turned around and said, “Relax and rest. Everything is going to be okay.”
I smiled, and didn’t reply.
I closed my eyes and thought of Ye Lin. So many years have passed, and those memories have become too burdensome. It really is time to let them scatter like the wind. While I was in a dreamlike state, it felt like another person had entered the room. But since I had taken some cold medicine earlier, it made me tired to the point that I couldn’t even open my eyes. It felt like a pair of cool hands enclosed my hand within theirs. I didn’t really like this kind of touch, when I tried to release my hand, it got held even tighter.
When I opened my eyes again, the surrounding was empty and no one was around. I looked at my hands; the infusion needle had already been removed and the wound was closed with some medical tape. I got out of bed and entered the washroom. I opened the faucet to let the cool stream flow onto my hands.
The next day when I woke up, I didn’t see Pu Zheng nor his congee. More surprisingly, Yang Ya Li was present.
“Where’s Ye Lin?” Although her tone was amiable, it didn’t sound polite.
Since I’m not used to speaking to someone while lying down, I sat up and looked towards the window. The fallen snow during the end of December have already stopped. What remained was miles of endless silver and the biting cold of the winter chill.
“I”m going to ask one question, where is Ye Lin?” She asked again.
“Why are you asking me?” After all, if we’re talking about position of status, it shouldn’t be her who’s asking me this.
“I’m certain he’d been here.” She said.
I pondered for a moment and said: “Whether he’s been here, I’m not certain. But, Miss Yang, I can tell you with certainty, I haven’t seen him. At least, since drinking, I have not.
Yang Ya Li looked at me and deliberated the honesty within my words. After a while, she opened her mouth: “I won’t let anyone have Ye Lin, and that includes you, Jian An Jie. I hope you remember this point.” Before leaving, she said one more sentence. “I wish you a quick departure from the hospital.”
I thought what she said was humorous. Just then, my phone rang. When I looked at the phone, it was a unfamiliar number.
“Where are you?” The voice sounded somewhat familiar.
The other side was quiet for a moment: “Xi Xi Chen.”
Right then, I clearly felt my fingers quiver for a second and then the calm was restored.
“What is it?” I didn’t expect it to be him. As is, he should be someone that unless absolutely necessary, he wouldn’t come in contact with me.
“Miss Jian. You sure are forgetful.” His voice sounded cold.
I forgot I had to return to Jian Villa yesterday. But so what? Why does his tone make it seem like I’m being put on trial. If I return, or when I return, it’s none of his business.
“I know now, thank you for your reminder.”
“You’re welcome.” His reply was calm and restrained, mixed in with a trace of unhappiness.
Such an annoying person. Right when I was about to hang up the phone, sound from the other end transferred over once again. “Since Miss Jian is now aware, then let me ask one more question. What time will Miss Jian arrive at the Jian house?”
I paused for a sec: “Xi Xi Chen, don’t you think you’re overly meddling in other people’s business?”
“Give me a specific time.” He didn’t pay attention to my taunt. His cool tone remained steady.
“Dare I ask, Mr. Xi, what identity are you using right now to ask me these questions?” Is there a need for me to report all this to him so clearly. “I don’t think I need to explain to an ‘outsider’ the time I will be returning ‘home’, do I?” I mocked him. Ironically, it felt like I was mocking myself too.
“Mr. Jian, your father also needs to know the exact time you’ll be arriving. To reduce unnecessary wait time.” He sounded very serious. As if, he was the one who had to wait all this time.
I guess this person is purposefully trying to make it difficult for me. “Probably in another two days.” It seemed my cutting remarks had no effect on him. In that case, there’s really no point in exerting too much effort in continuing the conversation. I half-assed the answer.
“Miss Jian, I think you didn’t hear me clearly. I meant the ‘exact time.”
I clenched my teeth, “Tomorrow.”
“Okay. Tomorrow.” He stopped for a moment and said, “If you need, I can send someone over to pick you up.”
“I still recognize the way back.”
“I hope so.”
Later, Pu Zheng arrived and stayed with me all afternoon. In the evening, he helped me with the discharge procedures. Lin Xiao Di and Mo Jia Zhen both arrived for a visit. Only after confirming that I’m okay did Xiao Di reluctantly returned back to Taiwan.
On the way back, Pu Zheng withdrew a stack of paper from his suit’s pocket. “I ordered this when you called me this morning. Tomorrow morning’s flight ticket heading to Shanghai. Also, the morning after tomorrow’s flight ticket returning to France. Do you really need to be this rushed? You’ve just came back.”
Ge (older brother)…..I think I’ve never called you like this before. Thank you. Thank you for all the care you’ve given me all these years. Back when I was still studying in China, it was almost awkward for us to refer to each other as siblings. So many years have passed, we’ve all grown up, it has become even harder to call each other brother and sister. But, what I want to say is that, in my heart, you have always been my closest older brother. In this city, besides you, there’s no one else that I’ll miss. Since this place no longer holds any significance, there’s really no point in me staying any longer.
After Pu Zheng finished hearing everything, he nodded his head. “I’ll send you to the Jian house tomorrow. Once finished, I’ll send you to the airport.”
I smiled. “Okay.”
When we arrived at Pu Zheng’s apartment, I got out of the car first. Pu Zheng went underground to park the car. Since it was cold outside, I was thinking to walk towards the apartment entrance, when suddenly, my arm was grabbed by a person from behind me. A extremely beautiful face greeted me —- Ye Lin!
At this moment, he looked somewhat haggard, dejected, and his pair of peach shaped eyes were covered in bloodshot veins.
Once I settled down from my fright, I tried to break free my wrist from his hand, because it was starting to hurt. “Ye Lin ——-“
Before I even finished speaking, his hot breath was blowing towards my face. In the next second, my lips were covered by his lips and my mind went completely blank. When I recovered, he’d already laid his head on my shoulders.
He quietly murmured: “You don’t want me anymore?” He sounded miserable.
It felt like I was bewitched. I involuntarily raised my hands and touched his soft black hair. It carried a sense of nostalgia.
Ye Lin’s body stiffened and he raised his head to look at me. Something flashed before his eyes, bright and glorious. Slowly, he lowered his head close to my lips again. My body shivered and I was suddenly awakened. Aware that I’d let my guards down, I forcefully pushed him away—- Ye Lin was taken by surprise and took one big step backwards. With his body standing very straight, he starred at me. “Jian An Jie. Do you still want me?” His gentle voice attempted to collapse all of my defenses.
This cunning man!
“Ye Lin. Stop playing around. Whatever you want to say, just say it directly.” I no longer wanted to spend time guessing his thoughts.
His expression looked hurt. He stared deeply into my eyes. “Jian An Jie. I love you.”
My heart abruptly jumped—— These words really should not be uttered anymore.
“I love you——- Do you hear me! I love you!” The calmness I exhibited outwardly caused him to become even more impatient.
“Six years ago, we’d already broken up, Ye Lin.” I could hear myself sounding very calm.
“I love you!” He stubbornly said what he wanted to say.
I looked at him. “Ye Lin, we broke up already.” I tried to tell him the facts clearly, and to myself.
“I don’t want to be broken up with you!” He grabbed both of my hands. “I’ve regretted it. I don’t want to break up. I said I’ve regretted it! I don’t want to break up with you!”
“Ye Lin. You were the one who said you wanted to break up.” This type of quarrel, it’s like I’d returned to six years ago. It made me slightly tremble involuntarily.
“It was you who forced me to say it! You didn’t care about me. You didn’t care about me at all. You said you wanted to go to France. I got scared. I was angry. I said I wanted to break up. I wanted you to be nervous. I wanted you to stay! But, but…..” Towards the end, his voice actually carried a bit of sadness. “But you still left!” He raised his head to look at me. “You’d always been able to make your decisions so absolute. So straightforwardly. Forward to the point that I almost felt like you’d never loved me before!”
If I didn’t care, didn’t love, it would’ve been impossible to allow a person to stay by my side for six years.
So, this was how he felt all along. To be this misunderstood, even if I’m hearing this after six years of separation, it still hurt.
“Ye Lin…..” I said it slowly, softly, but every word was clear.
“I loved you, before. When you told me you wanted to break up, I was hurt, deeply hurt. I was kicked out from my family. I went to look for you. I told you I needed to go to France. Forced to go to a place where I couldn’t even communicate with the language. I only wanted to find you. But, you said ‘let’s break up, Jian An Jie’.”
———Jian An Jie. If you want to go to France, then just go. What’s the point in telling me. Who am I to you. If we’re being honestly, I’m nobody!
“But, even if you said you wanted to break up, I still thought of you. From the moment I’d arrived in France, I’d already wanted to find you. I really wanted to…… I really wanted you to give me some hope. Even if it was just one sentence of encouragement. When I finally mustered the courage to call you, the one who picked up wasn’t you. She said you didn’t want to pick up my calls. At that time, I was standing in the street, I couldn’t remember the way home. I wanted to ask someone, but I didn’t know their language.”
“Ye Lin. We were together for six years. Not sixty days. During the first few months, I literally dreamt of you every day. For a long period of time, I didn’t want to wake up. Because in my dream, you were by my side.
“The second time, also the last time I called your number, I really shouldn’t have called. But I was really scared. Early in the morning, I found the girl in my dormitory, one of the only person I had considered my friend here, dead in the bathroom. The police came and took me away to collect cross evidences. I was questioned all day and night. By the time I was released, my body, and my mind were both about to break down….. I only wanted to find you. After that time, I made the decision to never find you again.
“Ye Lin, it’s me.”
“You need something?” After a long silence, a cold and ruthless voice came through.
“I……miss you, Ye Lin.” Humans are the only animal that have mental sentiments. Especially during moments of weaknesses, we particularly want to rely on someone else. Someone we feel is extremely important to us.
“Really. You miss me? If you’re calling only to tell me these things, then, I won’t bother accompanying you.”
“Ye Lin, I want to see you. I…..I’ll think of a way to return, we——-“ I putted aside my self-esteem and pride, and humbled myself to beg him.
“But I don’t want to see you, not even a bit. If possible, I wish I can forget everything that’s related to you!”
I raised my head towards him. He looked at me stunned. Finally, the hands that were holding my hands slowly loosened. He took a few staggering steps back and then laughed. “Jian An Jie, you are so cruel. Those words, were they intended to make me completely lose my face, so I wouldn’t be able to stand in front of you ever again? If I said I’d been waiting this whole time for you to return, would listening to it make you feel even more disgusted? He he he……It seems the fact that I’ve become this pathetic and laughable, I’ve deserved it.” As he talked, he also took steps backwards. His steps were very uncoordinated.
I watched as he finally turned his body and left. The back that always exuded proudness, seemed a bit bleak today. My heart stung a bit.
Am I cruel? Once denied, I will never accept it again. Once hurt repeatedly, I won’t harbor anymore hope. If this is considered cruel, then I guess, I am cruel.
They say happiness is similar. There are ten million kinds of misfortune. I’ve experienced way too much pain. Now, I’m as timid as a mouse.
At this time, Pu Zheng called.
“My friend called me. I have some stuff. I need to go out. Are you home yet?”
“Yes. You go do your thing.” I said. When I turned, I saw Xi Xi Chen standing close by under the street lights!